Something More Than Human

It seems to bother a lot of people that what I did (murder and rape children) doesn't seem to bother me. In fact, I do believe that one of the purposes of the so-called “Justice System” is to make what I did bother me (i.e. make me “pay for” my crimes). This is decidedly ironic since the purpose I set out on my rampage of rape and murder in the first place was for the exact same reason; to make society “pay for” what it did to me.
So, should I be bothered? I think not, since clearly all I did was what people (in general) seem to always do. Whether you call it “justice” or “revenge” doesn't matter. The only difference between what I set out to do, and what the “System” sets out to do, is the number of people who concur. As if to emphasize this, I even received a letter once from a man who insisted I would get what I “deserve” because “majority rules”. Well, if that is true, then the Holocaust was deserved by the Jewish people (because the majority of Germans supported the Nazi regime that condemned the Jews as criminals who poisoned society – which by the way, prior to WWII was a popular and majority belief in the United States as well!).
So again I ask, should I be bothered? It seems to me that I was only being human by attacking what I perceived to be the source of my misery. So when the present regime officials put their poison needle in my arm “to make me pay” then my own attempt to “make society pay” will be vindicated.
A part of me sincerely looks forward to that day for the vindication alone (not to mention the ultimate freedom and escape that death promises). And yet, another part of me thinks that it is selfish for me to even want to be vindicated. What I did may be “just what people do”, but that doesn't make it acceptable; it only makes it human.
Someday, I believe, we will all become something more than human.